Everyday Superstar: Avri James

  It was just before dawn, and I was wide awake...Landon's words about learning one another played in my head like a verse on repeat; I couldn't stop thinking about them.  He was right; on sooo  many levels.  We had spent so much time building and maintaining our own individual identities, I didn't realize we had spent hardly any  on our collective one.  Landon and I had no idea how to be in an actual relationship with the adult versions of ourselves.  I mean, technically, we had One Summer-as children-that's it.  He and I had been separated for a long time; one that saw us transition from kids to adults.  When we came back together, we only focused on the things that remained the same; giving little to no regard for all the things that had changed.  In all actuality, neither one of us had any idea of what the adult versions of us were even really like... Come to think of it, I couldn't remember the last time we had spent an entire day together...shit, had we ever? 

  " It's not that I don't want you here, It's something about the way you stare into my eyes/I know that I don't make things clear, I fall for you every time I try to resist you..."                                                  Snoh Aalegra~ I Want You Around The more I live, the more I realize that our intended purpose in this particular lifetime is to simply observe-especially when it comes to ourselves.  Life itself is a living, breathing entity with a mind of its own; determined to express its most authentic self...with little to no interference from me.  It's becoming obvious, painfully, at times, that it still  happens... Life , that is; whether you choose to engage or not.  I came to this conclusion when it came to other people rather quickly; understanding that they really don't care what you think, they are just looking for validation in their own beliefs.  So I found it no great burden to make the comfortable shift to the background of the

Those of us currently walking the planet who are truly blessed, will have people in are lives who are the reflections of who we truly are.  If we are lucky enough, we see ourselves, and embrace this; even when what's being reflected back isn't a show of our finest hour.  For whatever reason, I seemed to be this mirror (completely unsolicited AND unwanted, BTW!) for almost everyone in my life.  The funny thing is, they ALL seemed to know  it.  I was always expected to have some profound incite into what was happening in their lives.  Then there are the ones that just keep their distance altogether because they're afraid I'll see something that they're hiding from the rest of the world.    I don't want to be involved with anyone's  shit!  As a matter of fact, I actively go around avoiding others because I have no desire to emmesh myself.  I have a mirror too; Landon.  I know all too well how hard it can be to face yourself, realizing that You are your only rea

  " It seems like I can finally rest my head on something real, I like the way that feels...its as if you know me better than I ever knew myself, I love how you can tell, all the pieces, pieces, pieces of me..."                                                          ~ Ashlee Simpson I Like me; ALOT.  I love how my mind works, the way I think about all the possibilities before making a decision.  Overall, I'm pretty satisfied with my choices, and prepared to deal with any fallout that may come.  I don't have secrets; if you don't know, then it's none of your business.  That goes Double  for my personal life.  It's between Me, and the other party involved- that's it.  The less people involved, the less explanation you have to offer when things change.  I never complain, never explain.  If you want to mess with me, you have to be willing to accept the fact that I change my mind; OFTEN.   It's a get down, or lay down situation; very cut and dry.  Lan