Skip to main content

Reality Check

Spaceketball by Geneva B.


So what happens after you tell someone you love them?  Plans begin to change...My Brave New World would not be explored alone after all.  Landon would be going to school very nearby at Columbia University, while I would be attending Xavier in the fall.  This was real; we were actually going to do this!  I still couldn't believe it.  This was completely uncharted territory for us, and, if I was being honest with myself, I was a little nervous...

Once something is said, no matter what comes next, there's no taking it back.  My head raced with all the things unknown:  "What if this changes us?!"  I still hadn't learned all of his idiosyncrasies; the more I thought, the more of a nervous wreck I became.  It was one thing to push my feelings to the wayside knowing we were nowhere near each other; it was a very different thing to have him right down the street.  Whatever was going to happen between us from now on would have to be addressed immediately; there could be no more keeping things to ourselves.  I stood in the linen aisle of Lacey's for at least twenty minutes, as these thoughts swam around.  Suddenly my phone vibrated in my pocket...Startling me back to reality, I reached for it.  It was a text; a message from Tre...

Now, this was definitely a surprise.  After our last conversation, I was certain he would never speak to me again.  The message was insignificant, just asking how I had been, and if I was ready to leave for school.  I responded, saying all was well, and was currently in-store trying to handle my linen situation.  He went on to say his internship had ended, and he had been pretty isolated the last few weeks.  I continued to shop, not really  having much of a response to that.  The very next message that came through sent my anxiety into overdrive:  "Come visit ad keep me company one day.  Tell me what you want to eat and drink, and let's make it happen!"  WTF?!  WHY?!  Never a dull moment for Avri!!

I couldn't believe what I was reading!  After all the BS Landon and I just got over dealing with Tre!  I felt Landon's words still burning in my ears about the entire situation being caused by me not telling him how Tre felt about me.  NOW, he was asking, yet again, for me to come spend time with him.  This JUST Happened; we weren't even all the way recovered yet!  How was I now going to fix my face and say, "Oh yea, by the way, I got another invite!"  I stopped the conversation right after replying with an abrupt, "nope!"  I blocked him to ensure no other unwanted correspondence would come through.  I needed   to figure out how I was going to tell Landon; there was no way I was making the same mistake twice!!

I grabbed one of each towel with coordinating washcloth and dashed to the register.  I needed out of this store so I could think.  Landon and I were too precarious for this to remain unsaid.  I just couldn't let anything else trivial come between us....

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Flash Forward: The Twin Flame Connection

              One of the things I get the most comments on when it comes to Avri James and Landon is about the Twin Flame Connection, what are my thoughts on it, and most importantly, do I believe in it.  Most of you guys out there want to know whether or not I consider what Avri and Landon have a TFC, and WHEN would it come into play in their story...Ask and ye shall receive!  By request, an anecdote from Avri and Landon that addresses just that; I hope it provides the strength needed to hold out for it ALL... There was ONE time, when I could no longer deny the TFC; and I knew for sure it was real...I lived out of state for a while and had been seeing someone else.  Landon and I hadn't seen each other for a time, and had been living separate lives.  I had been coming and going, but ours paths just never seemed to cross.  One day, my family attended this baby shower.  I chose not to, as I didn't know the intended at all....

Great Expectations

              I couldn't believe it; it was FINALLY here!!  This trip had been at the forefront of all my thoughts for the past few weeks-now that it was actually time to leave it all felt surreal.  It honestly felt a little strange to be this excited about going on a trip I had originally planned and discussed so many times before with Landon.  In all actuality, I never thought I would get the chance to go.  I just figured the Universe would open up and swallow me, and I would never make it!  The strangest part of all though, was that it didn't even bother me, which caused me to feel slightly uneasy, just for a few moments; old habits die hard.  For once, I felt like I was doing something for ME.  My greatest desire for the whole thing was to find out what parts of Avri still remained; to remember who the fuck I was.  I had felt so lost and disconnected lately- an Avri identity crisis, if you will... See, that's...

Charleville 9200

"Why you take me up this high?  /Just to put a hole in my Parachute /So I would fall for you /And why you let us get this low? /When you know I'd give up my life for you /Ride and I'll die for you, I...Say do you remember? /Back when shit was good /2 kids in the night /We were so Alive..."                                                                                 Snoh Aalegra You know, we all talk endlessly about happiness; more specifically, what we need to achieve it.  In actuality, it's something that emanates from within.  There is not one thing outside of yourself that can contribute to your personal happiness in any way.  We obsess over the details of our lives in an attempt to place the blame of unrealized potential on anything  else...except You ...it's...